Domestic abuse: accessible help and planning for safety

If there is danger now

Call 999 and ask for police if someone is in immediate danger. Say where you are if you can. If you cannot speak on a mobile, listen to the operator and respond by coughing or tapping if safe. Press 55 when prompted to reach police. Pressing 55 works only on mobiles and does not tell police your location. A silent call alone does not guarantee help will be sent. Landline handling is different; follow the operator’s instructions.

When speaking on the phone is difficult

If you cannot use a voice call, ask a trusted professional or specialist service to help plan an accessible emergency contact method. EmergencySMS requires registration before it can be used; the GOV.UK help page explains this. Arrange this when safe. Domestic-abuse webchat, email and online forms are not emergency services. Explain whether voicemail, texts, letters or callbacks could put you at risk.

Recognising abuse

Domestic abuse can include violence, sexual pressure, threats, humiliation, control of money, isolation and monitoring. It can happen after a relationship ends. A family member or partner who provides care can also be abusive. The legal domestic-abuse definition concerns personally connected people aged 16 or over. Abuse by an unrelated paid worker may fall outside that definition, but remains a serious safeguarding concern. Children affected by abuse also need protection and support.

Abuse linked to disability

Someone may hide your communication device, control medicine, withhold personal care, interfere with equipment or tell others you cannot make decisions. They may take benefits or use your need for support to stop you seeing people. Dependence on someone for care does not give them permission to control or harm you. Tell the service what practical support you would need to be safe without that person.

Speak privately and in your own way

You can ask a GP, social worker, police officer or specialist worker for a private conversation without the person you fear. Ask for an independent interpreter, communication aid, more time or an advocate. A person who may be involved in the abuse should not interpret or answer for you. Explain how you show distress or communicate yes and no. Ask about confidentiality and when information might need to be shared for protection.

Specialist help for different people

Refuge’s National Domestic Abuse Helpline offers women and people concerned about them free telephone support, 24 hours daily, on 0808 2000 247. Men’s Advice Line supports male victims on 0808 801 0327. Galop supports LGBT+ adults aged 18 and over on 0800 999 5428. The latter services have set opening hours; check their websites. Ask about communication support and a service suited to your situation. You can seek advice without first reporting to police.

A safety plan that fits your life

A specialist can discuss options with you whether you are staying, considering leaving or have already left. Planning may include a safe contact, emergency help, transport, accessible accommodation, medication, equipment, personal care, children and pets. Leaving can change the risk, so a plan needs to fit your circumstances. You do not have to confront the person or announce plans. Ask what support is available before relying on a promised place or service.

Your devices may not be private

Someone may monitor accounts, location sharing, messages or a device. If possible, seek help using a safer device that the person does not control. Private browsing and quick-exit buttons do not remove every trace. Changing passwords, deleting history or disabling tracking can alert someone and increase risk. Ask specialist technology-abuse support before making changes where that is a concern. Do not download an app or save a plan on a monitored device.

Care, housing and money matter

Tell a specialist worker about step-free access, hoists, overnight support, communication, medicine and other essential needs. A refuge may not meet every need, so ask services to work together on a safe option. Contact adult social care if you need replacement care or safeguarding support. If children need protection or support, contact children’s social care. An independent adviser can explain housing and financial options rather than leaving you to negotiate with the abusive person.

Legal protection and immigration concerns

Ask a solicitor or specialist service about police protection, relevant court orders, legal aid and safe child arrangements. The appropriate order depends on the circumstances. If a person uses your visa or immigration status to threaten you, seek regulated immigration advice alongside abuse support. Some migrant victims qualify for specific support routes; not everyone qualifies for the same route. Do not rely on the abusive person’s claim that no help is possible.

Supporting someone else

Listen without blaming them or demanding they leave immediately. Ask how you can contact them safely and what help they want. Offer support to reach a specialist service. Do not confront the person causing harm or arrange a joint discussion as a way to solve the abuse. Use safeguarding or emergency routes where needed, and explain any necessary sharing of information as safely as possible.

If help does not meet your needs

Explain the access problem and ask for a safer alternative, independent advocacy or escalation to a manager. Record only what is safe to keep; you do not need an abuse diary before asking for help. Tell professionals about immediate care or safety gaps rather than waiting for a complaint outcome. The safeguarding and police guides explain further routes.

Help if someone close hurts or controls you

Get help in an emergency

What abuse can look like

Ask for private support

Make a safety plan

Safe ways to get help

What you can do next

More useful links